Rejection Story 3: VISA DENIED

Last Updated on 18 November 2014 by Gertrude

It was so painful I recall: twisting, turning, cursing, my heart felt like it could fall. With swollen eyes and brutal unpreparedness I bore the tragedy, yet,  I had planned the journey from A to Z,  no detail left. I was crushed, the two and a half hour journey seemed impossible, the whole time, in a ten-seat bus the man who sat beside me tried to have a glimpse. He wouldn’t because my hair hid me from the world. I was mourning the end of a love journey.

For months my boyfriend and I had planned on how we (Child and I) would go to visit him. See, I got one of those terrifying moments, ”VISA DENIED”. We had planned on having a good time, with each other, to start our life together, from there. All hope shuddered,  my journey to Nakuru feeling like an eternity, the whole time cursing why I even met him. Why God couldn’t allow us to be together. “I will never go to him”, I declared.

Few days later and the pain was never gone. I requested for him to come we place a complaint together but, ” I can’t,  because of work”. Did he add to my stress and depression? WELL, YES. I knew then and there, the man had been joking, work was mostly important than me, us. I told him it was for the best we ended our love,  become friends because long distance love never works.

Coming to the end of week one, as I sat somewhere watching melodramatic Nigerian Movies and I saw a woman in the same dilemma as mine. Just like me,  the lady wanted to go live with her boyfriend against her brother’s will. Her brother was a Catholic Priest. He said, ” If the man purports to love you as he says, why break your leg by going to live at his place?. Don’t you have a home at our parents place, have you been chased?. This man is looking for the easy way out, and the easy way out is staying with him without being married; one,  two, three kids. You become shapeless and ugly and fat, he starts bringing other women to the house. “Because of what?”,  the lady asked. “Simple, cheap meat and he is not your legal husband, you cannot claim a ”steak” from him”.

Was I touched, shocked, relieved? It’s to say the least, I hadn’t looked at it from this angle, I was, am in love, what does it matter to lose me in a few moments to a man I am not married to? Though I didn’t instantly break up with my boyfriend, I learnt early enough. Let him come claim a steak from our house and not vice-versa. While rejection made me go into instant loss of mind, it salvaged me from myself,  my insufficiency of blind love. In this case, this was a positive for me, then the days following I had nightmares regarding the same issue. A new chapter begun.